Sunday, 18 January 2009

'New Aids Cure' Sold in North Korea

Having proven it's effectiveness as an AIDS treatment in Clinical trials held in South Africa and The Gambia, the North Korean's have bought the world's remaining stock of Oil of Ulay, but are bizarrely selling it as a contraceptive cream rather than as an after the fact cure as originally intended. In fact North Korea claims they have found it even more effective applied in this way with no cases of AIDS at all reported amongst the Population.

It's a little known fact that the change of name to Oil of Olay came about because of an argument between Albert O'Balsam and Robert Mugabe (the brand creators) over the African-wide rights to the name 'Bubulin', the secret ingredient in the original formula that was replaced by pro-retinase for the 'Olay' re-branding. Mugabe wouldn't allow O'Balsam equal share in the New formula and avoiding costly - and (as we now know) potentially dangerous - litigation O'Balsam cut and ran with Ulay.

Years in the wilderness for O'Balsam and Ulay, ostracized by the Western Media, saw Albert selling off the back of a Truck in South Africa, where he struck gold as the Government Health ministry began to hear reports from back alley AIDS Clinics that Ulay users were showing no signs of deterioration once they'd started applying the cream. With a speed previously unseen in tackling AIDS in Africa, joint Government Trials under Yahya Jammeh and Thabo Mbeki quickly brought the corroboration required to begin rolling out the new treatment.

Almost immediately though that ruination of modern African history, Greed, reared it's ugly head and saw all stocks of Oil of Ulay sold of to North Korea winning fabulous profits for the major players but heaping more misery on the poor.

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